Badass husband and I have a pretty awesome hobby. We play Black Ops together as a way to bond… or sometimes get really furious with each other. I highly recommend this to all couples as a way to get to know your significant other better. You never know what you’re gonna find out about their rage issues.

First of all, Black Ops happens to be my fave game at the moment so I might be a little biased. It’s a great upgrade, in my opinion, from Modern Warfare 2. The reason I say this is that the online multiplayer can be played by two people at once, so it’s a bit more fun to do with friends. It’s set up in split-screen so he’s on top, I’m on bottom. Like that double entendre? Me too.

So hubby and I both get online, work together (hopefully), and cause mass destruction.  Well, usually it’s more like mediocre destruction. I’m a fan of video games but I’m most definitely not the most talented player. I hold my own but just barely. And the hubby is about the same, so this game is always giving us a challenge.

After the kids get to bed, we sit there in front of the TV in our living room, with our trusty dogs at our side. We close all the curtains so none of our much cooler neighbors can see what we’re doing. Often I’ve got a friend or two online so I actually pull the super-sexy headset out and we form a group. Time for a rousing match of Domination (and not the bedroom kind of domination). This is typically how it goes:

Hubby: Why aren’t you helping me? We’re getting our butts kicked on the right side!

Me: I’m on the right side! There’s nobody here!

Hubby: No, the right side of C! The C FLAG NOT THE A FLAG!!!!

Me: Okay, here I come. (Proceed to die about five times trying to truck across the map)

Hubby: YOU STILL ARENT HELPING GODDAMMIT!

Me: I KEEP DYING!

Dogs sense the growing frustration and quietly leave the room. Eventually I get to the mystical “right side of C” and there are no bad guys. One of us rage quits.

Okay, this isn’t ALWAYS the case. Often one or both of us goes on a killing spree and we finish a game all happy and giving each other high-fives. Because as every gamer knows, there is nothing so validating in life as finishing first on a game of Team Deathmatch!

Anyway, what I have learned about my marriage because of Black Ops: My husband is much easier to anger. And his way of venting frustration is much louder than mine. He gets mad and fumes and starts blaming the whole team. Years ago, when we had a Playstation 2, he would take the controllers out and smash them on the sidewalk. He has outgrown that habit, luckily. He might actually have a better way of venting than me. When I get angry, I turn inwards and fume to myself, not saying much, and then quit and refuse to talk to anyone. This is true outside of the Xbox world as well. I think the hubby’s way of being frustrated is much more productive, because he rages and gets it out and is fine a couple seconds later. Me, on the other hand? In typical female fashion, I carry it around with me for way too long and then finally lash out when least expected. Ladies, you know you do this too.

Of course, there is a great positive side to this, I promise! Often things go well and we are happy and get pumped up that we’re doing well. And then we actually work TOGETHER to accomplish a goal. A great lesson to use in real life also, no? I can think of several groups of people who could benefit from some Black Ops action. (Ahem, congress)

So thank you, badass husband, for not breaking any controllers during your fits of rage. I promise to get over to the left side of C next time. I love you times a zillion!

Muah

G.G.